Stay in touch with your parents

Leaving home to go to university is a major step in your life and the change can be daunting. If you would like help getting settled into EPFL, you can schedule an appointment with one of our student coaches.

Chances are, the change isn’t easy for your parents either. After you leave they could experience empty nest syndrome and miss having you around. Your new-found independence could even be a source of conflict between you and your parents, especially if you’ve always been very close. It’s not easy to set boundaries between your life as a young adult and your ties with your family.

On the other hand, it’s perfectly normal for your parents to worry about you – that means they love and care about you. So be sure to call them regularly; that will reassure them and keep them from calling the school to find out if you’ve gotten over your cold.

It may be that your parents are paying for some or all of your studies, which could amount to a hefty sum. In that case, they would have the right to know how your classes are going.

While it’s important to stay in touch with your parents, you should also learn to assert your independence and build a life of your own – even if you meet with some resistance. You are doing nothing wrong by staking out your own space. On the contrary, it’s a healthy process that will contribute to your personal development. Your parents should not (or no longer) be involved in everything that goes on in your life. It’s time to stand on your own two feet.

If you feel your parents are putting too much emotional or financial pressure on you, or if you feel your relationship has become toxic, don’t be afraid to ask for help from our Student Services Desk.

As in everything else, moderation is the key. It’s important to venture out on your own, and it’s important to maintain respectful, adult relationships with your family. That will give you a solid foundation to build on.